How to Survive at Work by Not Pissing Anyone Off!
The one skill I’ve learned from my job in the last 20 years is not to piss people off and get yourself in deep crap. How did I learn this skill- unfortunately by trial and error which resulted in me pissing off many people but somehow miraculously not losing my job. I guess it helped that I had a Civil Service job doing finance work where not that many people knew what I really did, which was goof off most of the time! Anyway, here’s some of the wisdom I’ve acquired that might help you last on the job.
1. If you get into a situation with a boss or supervisor, that could be their fault, do not take a pre-emptive first strike and complain to a higher up. This to me was the best thing I learned at work. Almost 95% of the time the situation will blow over and your boss will not take action against you and it will be forgotten. I know it sounds difficult, but this is how these situations usually play out. To reiterate, the best thing to do, is do nothing.
2. Do not raise your voice or talk down to someone, no matter what their position or if they deserve it. All that you will be accomplishing is making an enemy who will be happy to report you to some higher up as soon as they’re aware you did something you shouldn’t have done.
2A. If you somehow do raise you voice or talk down to someone, make sure there are no witnesses around. If there are, they could get you for insubordination, improper conduct, etc. Remember if there are no witnesses you can always deny, deny, deny and personnel action can not be taken on 1-1 accusations unless you admit guilt.
3. Do not say the slightest, no matter how mild, sexually based comment or comment about dating, your love life, etc. at work, in regards to anything. Do not compliment any woman on how she looks or dresses, etc. Say nothing. If some of your fellow workers are having any kind of discussion about sex, relationships, etc., no matter how mild, just move away from them till the discussion is over. All it takes is one complaint, no matter how ridiculous it seems, and you could find yourself in deep trouble as your organization will investigate sexual harassment/hostile environment, like a pack of rabid dogs on raw meat, just to cover their butts.
4. Try not to brag about how great things are going in your life to anyone. It will probably cause a few people to be jealous and resentful and they will try to “screw you” if they get the chance.
5. Unless there is someone of the opposite sex at work you really think there is potential for a long-term relationship, do not pursue, as they could harm you later on. I f someone asks you out and you’re not interested, I’d simply tell them you won’t date anyone at work as a policy and/or that you’re seeing someone else. This way they won’t take rejection, personally.
6. Mind your own business and do not report anyone for anything, unless it directly affects you. IE, if you see someone coming into work an hour late each day and they don’t work for you or affect your performance, keep your mouth shut.
7. Try not to be opinionated on general subjects around people you’re not close too. IE., don’t talk or argue about OJ, politics, etc., if you have a strong stance on something no matter how right you think you are.
8. Almost every place you work has someone I call a “Designated Asshole”. You can usually recognize them right away as they’re usually the nicest people on your first day of work! Let the buyer beware.
The bottom line is, you need to decide for yourself if its worth it to tone yourself down 8 hours a day to make work less stressful or just be yourself, no matter how it affects your work situation. I was myself, which is how I got into those situations in the first place but learned to adopt after each screw up.
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