Law and Order SVU “Transitions” Destined to Be John Waters Movie

I just saw the greatest over the top episode of Law and Order SVU, “Transitions” that’s destined to become a cult TV Classic. I expect to see the great John Walters remake this episode into a movie in 10 years. There is nothing better then watching good actors give straight performances without realising they’re in one of the most over the top written episodes ever on TV much less Law and Order SVU. This episode was so bad, it was great.

It starts off with 2 strippers fighting with each other because the black stripper accused the white stripper of stealing part of her outfit. The black stripper goes outside to go home and she thinks the white stripper is following her and its going down. Except its not the white stripper but a guy who’s bleeding all over his crotch and passes out in front of her.

The next thing we know the guy is in the hospital and doesn’t have any real ID on him except a picture of him and his son. We get the impression he might be dying and its confusing if part of his you know what was cut/damaged, they don’t make it clear. He’s not in great shape though as he lost a lot of blood.

So the Detectives go back to the strip club which doesn’t seem to be the classiest strip club around and the strippers aren’t exactly knockouts. The white stripper who got into that fight earlier with the black stripper is questioned and the detectives get nowhere until they talk to the Big Lesbian Bouncer. The Lesbian Bouncer leads them to Sid, played by Paul Lazer, without doubt the greatest male character ever to be on SVU. Sid is fascinated by the strippers who he loves to watch but a little bit too much as he’s been banned by the Strip Club but still keeps trying to come back and this time he was clocked by the Big Lesbian bouncer and had a big shiner.

Sid asks Olivia Benson the greatest SVU line ever, “Are You a Dancer?”, and Sid somehow directs SVU back to the white stripper, who trace her address from her car. When they get to the address it turns out that the stripper is from a good, wealthy family who hadn’t seen her for a while.

Somehow SVU tracks down the stripper who it turns out was using her mouth to entertain the victim but wait its not her because she is, surprise surprise, a graduate college student who is working on her thesis/writing a book about the whole experience and she tapes everything including her Bill Clinton performance which is used as an alibi. Stabler tells her to quit her stripping gig or he’ll have her arrested for prostitution. The beauty is none of this really had anything to do with the outcome of the story. The Law and Order Detectives are able to identify the victim and go to the victims house. There they are surprised to find the victim’s young son who is just a child but wait there’s more, he’s a girl. No he’s a boy! It turns out he/she is a transgender who wants to be a girl, all this at the young age I think of 11. The son/daughter is also really obnoxious which doesn’t help his/her’s cause. The mother is fully supportive of her son becoming a girl and is separated from her husband because he is totally not supportive to put it mildly.

The father eventually recovers and somehow is out of the hospital and walking about like nothing happened and it turned out the son/daughter admits to the crime which turns out to be a lie. All the son/daughter did was steal I think Hormone Pills from a factory with other transgenders at the time his father was attacked. The Female Principle or Guidance Counsellor of the kid’s school, I’m not totally sure which, who has been really nice and sensitive to the kid, then admits to the Police that it was she who attacked the father which makes no real sense unless she too is transgender which you can see coming a mile away but is not revealed yet.

So the Principle pleads not guilty and is now on trial. Her lawyer puts on the stupidest criminal defense I’ve ever seen on TV. She attacks the victim saying what a horrible father he was who wouldn’t accept his son as his daughter and tried to withhold hormone pills or something from the kid. Why the Law and Order Prosecuter didn’t at this point just say, “Your Honor and the Jury we stipulate the victim was a bad father who didn’t accept that his son wanted to be a girl and tried to keep hormone pills away from him, etc., etc. etc., but none of that is legal justification for trying to kill him”, I don’t understand. It was simply not a defense against the actual crime. Then comes the big, shocking, “Crying Game” reveal, and the woman reveals she was once a man, too. We’re all suppose to be shocked by this but we’re not as you could see this coming as I said a mile away. The Principle then tells the story of her life and how she was physically attacked and maimed when she was a man and the whole jury is moved as are the prosecuters. They offer the woman a 10 year plea deal and she accepts. The end.

Before I get hate mail from transgenders, this Blog isn’t meant to make fun of them but the total over the topness of this Law and Order SVU episode. If they had eliminated all the strip club stuff this could have been a good serious episode. Instead it became a cult classic of what could become a future John Waters movie. Please check out our large Online Discount Gift Store Click Here and our other Online Discount Stores below which helps support this politically incorrect blog. Thank you.

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